I’ve been self-censoring a lot lately. And really, I hate it. I always told myself that the day I could no longer be honest with myself and others on my blog would be the day I stopped blogging.

And really, whether it was a willing decision or not, that’s what’s been happening.

I’m sitting with multiple ideas for blog post topics, but the truth I’m having to stare in the face is taking up so much real estate in my mind that the instinct I try to write about something other than the truth, I get blocked.

But the instant I face the truth, I realize it’s hardly publishable online.

I just deleted half my blog post again.

And… again.

Yeah. Stuff it. I’m packing it in for today.

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Update Day

It’s the last Friday of the month, which means that’s it’s time for another Update Day post. For those of you who don’t know, a group of us set some crazy or important goals, and then, once a month, we post updates.

If you would like to join in, you can click this link for more information.

So how April went for me…

Sigh.

I’m just really glad I didn’t set any specific goals for this month.

At the same time, though, I’m annoyed by how everything seems to conspire to prevent me from achieving anything I set out to do.

Still alive though, so that counts, right?

Update Day

This post is for Update Day, which is our once-a-month update for the Got Goals Bloghop.

I’m a few days late in updating, and I have two reasons for it. Firstly, Update Day fell on Good Friday, which I had decided not to post on, and then I got majorly side-tracked on Thursday, which was when I was planning to write and schedule my update post.

Secondly… I got easily side-tracked because I had been procrastinating on writing this post. And… you know… blogging in general.

Why? Well… the thing with a monthly update (and blogging as a whole, really) is that it requires a certain amount of introspection.

Usually, it’s the case that I would feel like I achieved little, and would end up being surprised at how much I actually did get done.

March was another beast. One that I did not, and still don’t, want to face.

….

…………………………………………

Okay. I just faced it and it’s just making me feel nihilistic (and like I’m going to jump from somewhere high in the near future), so let’s not post that on the blog, even though I doubt anyone will see this thanks to A to Z. (She says after deleting about half the post she’s written.)

Suffice it to say… I didn’t achieve anything of not last month. And odds are there’s not going to be much in the way of improvement in April. On the contrary.

So I’m not going to set any goals, because I’m just going to hopefully let myself be pleasantly surprised in a few weeks.

I’m probably not going to blog much until the next Update Day either. So if I’m quiet this month… don’t worry… I’m probably around somewhere… But April happens to be a good blog break time if you’re not taking part in A to Z. (I’m not.)