Update Day: Missed It by That Much

Sigh. One of these days, I’ll be able to actually get everything done in time. It would be so very nice. In case you guys are wondering what I’m on about, yesterday was the last Friday of the month, so that means it’s time for another Update Day. And because I’m an absolutely terrible blog hop host, I didn’t remember I was supposed to post an update until it was way too late for me to post an update. *Eye roll*

So how am I doing? Well, I actually did great for most of the month, but the wheels fell off a little bit this past week. I got distracted from my writing work, but you know what? I actually don’t regret it. This past week I gave myself permission to do things just because I want to instead of because I have a goal to achieve a certain thing. Which was actually so refreshing.

Maybe it’s a bit bad because it put me behind, but for now, I’m just going to go with it until the end of the month. My brain obviously needs the break.

At the same time, I’ve also got a lot of work done on the freelance side, and despite the fact that I’m behind, I still manage to write/edit over 40k words so far. So regardless of how I do for the rest of the month, I’m going to call this a win.

In short, I’m really proud of myself. I’m really making leaps and bounds when it comes to not only getting things done, but also on knowing when to ease off the acceleration. It’s a bit unfortunate that it meant that I didn’t quite get everything on time at the end of the month, though. :-/

But there’s one good piece of news for me, though, and it’s that I’m definitely starting to pull things back together, and any and all progress I might be making counts as a win.

How are you guys doing? 

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Update Day: Bringing the Madness Under Control

Friday was the last Friday of the month, which means it was time for Update Day. But I’m only posting now because my schedule hasn’t really lightened up yet.

April was mad because of the massive job I got that had a deadline right around the end of the month. That went so well that the person who hired me in April hired me again in May. The job is a bit smaller, but its deadline was (you guessed it) on Friday. I had planned everything so that I could actually have time to write a post the way I’m supposed to, but the project kicked my butt in a MASSIVE way.

But here I am now. I’ve definitely made that decision I mentioned last time. It’s actually a terrifying thing that I decided to do, but I know it’s the right thing, which makes it exciting too. I’ll be making the announcement next month because while I have a firm grip on what I’m doing, getting it done is going to take a lot of preparation… which is hard to do when you barely have time to take a proper breath.

I’ll get there, though.

In other news, I did a large-scale overhaul of my lifestyle in May. This is part of my no-time problem, but I’ve decided to get a grip on my physical and mental health. I’m naming the two together because they’re linked. I know I’ve been suffering from a LOT of stress, but I’ve been eating badly and skipping exercise, which made me sleep badly, which added to the stress.

So I just reached a point where I realized I had to sort that crap out. So now I’m eating healthier and walking more for exercise. Although it does cut into my schedule a bit (it’s hard to be as productive while you’re changing your diet), I’m really glad I did it. It’s definitely helping me cope better and to think clearly about what it is that I’m doing.

Now the biggest thing for me for June is to keep to the healthy habits I’m building and to actually act on the decisions I’ve made this month. Wish me luck!

How are you doing?

IWSG: A Fresh Start

More information here.

After about three months of drama around finding a house, we’re finally moving to a new place. In fact, I’m writing this on Monday because I know that I’ll be about knee deep into packing, loading, and moving things by the time this post comes live.

Maybe I’m overly optimistic, but it’s really feeling like this move will mostly bring to an end five years of chaos that I’ve had to cope with every day. To that end, I’m really excited to get moving, even if the amount of stuff that needs to be dealt with would have other people pulling out their hair.

But at the same time, this new start also involves a ton of processing of another sort. Emotional. If this move is to be the first day of the rest of my life, I have to cut some stuff out and leave it right here in this house.

I’ve been so locked in survival/defense/fight/flight mode that it’s become my go to. The thing is… it’s exhausting. Except for hopeful, my other single-word emotional status is currently drained. So in a lot of ways, I haven’t felt like myself for at least three years… which is also why my fiction-writing productivity took a massive hit.

I’m not a person hoping for a certain set of perfect circumstances, but when negativity and the accompanying anxiety hits often and at random, making you lose any small amount of momentum you might have gained literally the day before… It’s heartbreaking.

So the fact that I managed to get Book 3 of War of Six Crowns to any stage of completion despite this is something for me to be proud of.

But despite this and despite my growing success as a full-time writer… I’m feeling a growing sense of discontent. In a sense this is a good thing. I’m actually calm enough and able to not be at panic stations for long enough to allow me time to miss certain things I had left by the way-side to just allow me to get through.

See, I’ve been cutting back to the bare minimum so that I could keep going while dragging such a huge amount of drama with me. But now I’m very much to offload the drama right here. Which should really leave a lot of space for other things. And right now, that space feels like a void. A void of writing where I took over two years to finish a rewrite and revision because I hadn’t been able to write consecutively for more than two days in a row in over two years. A void of art because I never felt secure enough to actually commit to an art project.

Here’s the thing though, I’ve been so used to… not… fitting everything in that the thought of moving furniture around in my head is pretty daunting. It feels almost like too much of a challenge to work and write and focus on my health and do more art (other than writing) and read more and resume my French practice so I don’t lose it again and be more active on social media and… and… and… 

But the thing is that I just have to find a way. My thinking is to spend maybe the rest of the month evaluating my life and everything I want to do, and then decide how I’m going to start bringing those things in.

Do you also find it daunting to make things fit into your life? How do you approach it?

IWSG: Learning to Write Again

It’s the first day of the week, so time for another Insecure Writer’s Support Group post.

Purpose: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!

Posting: The first Wednesday of every month is officially Insecure Writer’s Support Group day. Post your thoughts on your own blog. Talk about your doubts and the fears you have conquered. Discuss your struggles and triumphs. Offer a word of encouragement for others who are struggling. Visit others in the group and connect with your fellow writer – aim for a dozen new people each time – and return comments. This group is all about connecting!

Friday, sometime after my rather victorious Update Day post, I felt a sudden pinch on my left wrist and noticed that the small bump I had, had swollen and was now bigger and aching.

I went to my doctor and… yeah. As I suspected but didn’t want to really admit, I have a ganglion. Which is… annoying to say the least when you literally cannot afford the eight-week recovery time to cut it out. (And have a needle phobia. It’s enough to stand still to be injected. But to let someone put a needle into this thing to pull the fluid out–NOPE.)

That means one thing: Changing my habits to make things easier on my wrist.

And a big one is in the way I type.

See… I’m a self-taught typist, which means I’ve learned all sorts of bad habits over the years that pretty much came back to bite me in the ass seventeen years later. Because while doctors don’t know what causes these little buggers, hurting muscles does contribute, and… well… I’ve been straining my wrists for weeks, spending anything between twelve and fourteen hours per day on writing. The one that had the lump already was just the one that said “ENOUGH!!!” and called it a night.

And here’s the thing, for as long as my wrist is inflamed and the ganglion is being a pain, touch typing, as in that skill I never learned, is probably going to be the safest way for me to write. And I know it will be good for me. But damn it all if learning touch typing while suffering from a ganglion and with work needing to be done doesn’t make me feel stupid. 

Why? Well. I’ve been working on a computer for years. Years. I’ve been writing novels for seventeen, but I’ve been typing… well since I’ve learned to write. So we’re talking about 22 years’ worth of muscle memory I’m retraining on short notice… without being able to really practice for prolonged periods of time and OH BLOODY HELL I’M USING THE OLD WAY AGAIN.

Ahem. 

Yeah. It’s really irritating, but I’m hoping the ganglion will go down ASAP. If the touch typing doesn’t do it… I guess I’ll finally be caving and getting dictation software.

Anyone else get ganglions? Any tips for me? Anyone else think it’s stupid of a country’s curriculum to not make typing compulsory when most employment requires typing for long periods of time? 

Update Day: Still Hectic, but Getting Stuff Done.

This is the last Friday of the month, which means it’s time for another GotGoals? Bloghop update post.

Sorry if I’m keeping this a bit short, but like the title says, it’s hectic here at the moment.

At least I can say I got some important stuff done in July: 

1) I finished my own revisions to Book 3.

2) I got my visum.

3) I’m at a level with my French where I think I can call myself conversant again. (How’s that for a crash course of two months?)

Also, I won Camp NaNo with more than a week to spare.

What I want to do in August:

1) Prepare for my upcoming trip to France.

2) Find enough CPs for Book 3.

3) Start working on another manuscript while I rest Book 3/wait for CPs.

4) Clear as much as possible from my contract work to-do list before I leave for France on August 9th.

5) Finish two more bookmarks before I leave.

6) Have a great time in France.

That’s going to be it for me for today! I’m most likely going to be back for IWSG, but if not, I’ll see you guys when I come back on the 20th. How did your July go? What are your plans for August?

Update Day: Gosh I’m Busy

Last Friday of the month means it’s time for another update day. In case you’re wondering what I’m talking about, a group of us have set some crazy/very important goals. Then on the last Friday of the month, we post updates on our progress. You’re welcome to join, if you want. All you have to do is click here for more details.

 

 

As you guys might remember from last month, I got a major contract that’s really a massive jump forward for me. This was the first full month I did this, and guys… I just really love it. More than that, though, I’m proving myself to be more and more inexpendable by being able to understand economics, write articles, and read French. That last one seems to be especially handy, since the company I’m writing for is active in Africa, which has large francophone portions. As a result, the source documents I have to use in creating my articles are all French, and it looks like no one in the comms department (which is what I’m contracted to) can read it.

At any rate, this job has proven to be basically the only one I’ve ever done that has my brain firing both hemispheres. So yeah, it’s awesome. Also awesome is that it totally does count as using my writing skills, which means that as of this month, I’m just under halfway to my five-year monthly earnings goal.

Overall, though, I can say that my life is the best it’s been in… about four years. Although there are some major unresolved issues, it just becomes so much easier to cope when you’re making decent money.

But there’s a bit of a storm brewing, namely a massive and growing frustration at the fact that I’m not able to work on my own stuff as much as I want. See, when I was beyond stressed out 90% of the time, a lot of my creativity just… vanished. Now I’m unstressing and it wants to play. Don’t get me wrong, it’s loving the day-job right now. But let’s just say my muse is a bit pissed that I’m not making massive progress on my own books.

For this, though, I can’t blame the job. I’m just super busy all of a sudden. A lot of new opportunities are opening up for my family so, as the only one who’s “accounting literate” (as in able to tell the difference between debits and credits), I have to pitch in a lot and help. On top of this, I’m making a seriously concerted effort to brush up on my French.

One reason for this is the French reports I have to read. The other is that I got sponsored by someone to go to France for ten days in August. (!!!) We’re going to a rural area up north, though, and will be living with people who really aren’t all that good at English, so I’m doing as much as I can to be conversant in French. I’ve kept up my vocab for years by reading French, but because I don’t have a lot of access to French speakers, I’m seriously rusty on the speaking part. You know… just having the ability to spontaneously convert your thoughts into speech that the other guy understands.

This meant that I had to put even more of an effort into immersing myself, so more reading French, more French TV series (thanks, Netflix!) and just practicing on Duolingo. Oh and narrating almost everything I do to myself in French so I can get used to verbalizing thoughts. Most of this takes up a chunk of time, though.

The French trip also meant that I had to renew my passport (because of course it would expire the one time I really don’t have time to renew it), and will mean that I have to get my visum. Sigh.

So all in all, my life is still getting in the way of my writing, but just in a good way. This month, though, I really really want to finish revisions to Book 3. It’s been languishing long enough. I’m just going to make that my goal for July.

What about you guys? How are you doing? Any goals achieved, since we’re at the halfway mark?

Insecure Writer’s Support Group: Rolling Back the Hours

On the first Wednesday of every month, a sizable group of us writers take part in the Insecure Writer’s Support group. We share our insecurities, because in the end, it helps us to realize that we’re not the only ones feeling the way we do. If you want to check out the bloghop or sign up, you can find information here.

As I mentioned on my Update Day post, I actually had an amazing month in May, and although there are still quite a few things up in the air, I think June might end up being a big one too.

One of the major highlights of May was that I signed a contract with a major company to help create their content. It actually suits me perfectly because I’m using my degree and my writing skills together.

For now, the contract is basically a test run until December, but given how happy the lady in charge of my work is, I’m starting to feel secure in the fact that an extension past that is probable, even likely. It’s really strange to think that I’m this excited about the job, because it was so not what I had in mind when I started freelancing, but my brain is really enjoying the chance to use both hemispheres at the same time, since I have to be both analytical and creative, reading reams of reports and pulling all that information together into articles that people that haven’t read those reports can understand.

Best of all, assuming this is a long-term kind of gig, it actually gives me the level of financial security I need to allow me more writing hours.

So where’s the insecurity?

Well. In the fact that for the past two weeks, I’ve been sleeping through those writing hours, which means I’m still struggling to fit everything into my schedule.

See, when I was working fixed price gigs instead of hourly like I do now, my hours drifted. It didn’t matter what time of the day I did something as long as it got done before deadline. And I was “filling” my writing hours with freelance work because for the past few months, I was in no shape to be creative. The stress and anxiety from my life exhausted me emotionally, and since freelance was paying my way, I put the emotional reserves I had into that so I can keep racking up the good ratings. (A strategy that paid off in a big way because it directly led to this contract.)

The overall result was that my sleeping patterns shifted to hours inoptimal to my writing. I went to bed at 2 a.m. and woke up at 8, maybe 9. Then I’d work from about 10 a.m. to as late as 11 p.m., and veg out until 2 a.m.

Bad bad Misha.

Because a lot of the stress points in my life have lifted, which leaves me wanting to work on my own stuff. Thing is, if I want uninterrupted writing hours, and I do, I need to wake up at 6 a.m. It’s a simple thing, really. In theory, I should get to bed at around midnight and set my alarm.

Phht. Uh huh.

I did that.

Now I have the lovely sounds of my alarm as backdrop to my dreams.

As I sleep right through it to 8, maybe 9.

So now I’m going to move my hours some more and get to bed by 10 p.m. but it remains to be seen how that works out.

How do you guys on Daylight Savings Time manage to shift your sleeping patterns? It shouldn’t be that different from what I’m trying to do.