I Hate My Internal Editor Because It’s Right

Hey everyone! Before I get to today’s vlog post, I just wanted to let you know that I signed up for a charity auction for the victims of Hurricane Harvey. I’m offering to format a book for paperback and ebook, so if that’s something you need, you might end you getting my services for a steal. You can click here for more information.

Okay! Time for today’s vlog. As always, I left the script at the bottom for those of you who just can’t get into the vlog thing. Enjoy!

If I was to think of one word to summarize how I am right now, it would be:

FRUSTRATED.

Why?

Because I have this brain that tells me things like “Hah. You really want to just edit and publish this shit?”

Sarcastic voice and all.

Which I tend to ignore because often, that voice is dead wrong. However, out of two books I’ve wanted to pick up for revision, this voice chimed in twice. And it was right… twice.

Not that this is really a bad thing. I’m taking a long-term view of self-publishing. Yes, I could be publishing once every three months right now, but would I be happy with the quality of my books? Eh…no.

Which isn’t to bash people who are able to do that.

I just can’t.

It’s hard enough to let go of a book as it is. Let’s not rush the process.

But the thing is, my method has always worked as follows: Rough draft by hand, rewrite to computer (with a plan), revise, edit a million times, proofread a few times more, and then I’m ready for formatting.

Except now it’s not working that way. Because now, when my inner editor takes a look at my rewritten draft, it’s seeing glaring weaknesses that would be better solved with yet another rewrite than with revisions.

The previous three times this inner editor chimed up, I could say, “Hey chill out. Yes, it’s not perfect. But a scene here and there would be all this needs to be perfect.”

The last two times, though, my inner editor helpfully pointed out that somewhere between a half and three quarters of my plot wasn’t written.

And that’s a rewrite-scope problem. How do I know? Because the first time it happened, it took me almost a years’ worth of rewrites and FOUR TIMES the amount of words to tell the story in the right way.

But at least there I had the excuse of wanting to split a book in two.

This time, no such luck. This time, I just let major plot points occur way before intro and build-up was done. And so it feels like at least the first third of a story is missing.

Can I fix it by inserting those scenes? Not this time. Because stuff that’s missing now will impact reactions later.

So it’s another rewrite for me. On a book that’s been rewritten four times already, over sixteen years.

Kill me now.

Have you ever prepared to edit, only to realize the underlying draft isn’t worth editing? Did you ignore that feeling or did you rewrite? How did it work out for you?

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4 thoughts on “I Hate My Internal Editor Because It’s Right

  1. Most times, it’s a losing battle when I face off my inner editor. Sometimes I find myself using the backspace bar before I can stop myself. then I rewrite what I originally deleted and keep on going. Have to constantly remind myself that I’m just working on a draft. What matters most is getting the words down. I can let my inner editor go wild and free once I’m done. Until then I’ll stick my fingers in my ear and go na-na-na-na-na-na!

      1. I feel and write much freer when I write by hand. Whenever I’m stuck and or need to push through, and word sprints aren’t working, writing by hand is my preferred method.

      2. Yeah it’s the same with me. That’s why I even sprint by hand if I have to. I made an excel spreadsheet to help me keep track of my word counts. 🙂

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